mixed lettuce leaves and salad!

I went to the doctors this morning for an appointment with the Lovely nurse C. It’s almost worth being ill for a visit to her as she is that cheerful. Anyway I digress; I went for an MOT basically. The results could have been better but I am not exactly at deaths door. My blood pressure is high, my triglycerides (whatever they are) are very high and my red blood cell count is also high and the plates are enlarged added to that is a disturbing body mass index of 30 plus. So an action plan has been formed. I have to stop smoking, give up drinking, take more exercise and watch my diet. Basically I have to give up most of the things that make life worth living. I think it was Mae West who said everything I enjoy is illegal, immoral or fattening. I now know just what she means!

Work on the house has started and this morning a couple of electricians came along to fit a new main circuit board and hand me a certificate for electrical safety. Something that I understand, pretty soon every house that is going to be sold will require before it can go on the market. Well unlike me my home now has a certificate of electrical good health. Another job that will or should be completed before Christmas arrives is new guttering, fascias and soffits. This job is the hands of The Beast and I expect him to turn up one day with implements of destruction and plastic pipes and other such stuff and rip my house to shreds.

While the electricians were busy beavering away in the cupboard under the stairs I went out to the bank and knowing the kettle would not be useable for a couple of hours at least wandered into a local café not far from my branch. I have been in many cafes and indeed at one point myself and Riker were going to set up a website featuring the best of them in our area. We were both beaten to it by some bloke who is really into it and has made a fantastic site about cafes. He has done an amazing job and after seeing his site I knew that nothing I could build would compare with his. There is a link to this site on my links page but for the benefit of those of you cant wait to get there take a look at this. http://www.breakfastliverpool.blogspot.com/  Again I am digressing but I use this merely to illustrate that I know a thing or two about Cafes. Well this one looked nice and clean from the outside and I sauntered in and ordered a coffee and two rounds of toast. I expected it to be priced at about one pound 50 pence, toast normally costing about 30p a round and coffee about 80p. Imagine my surprise then when the lady behind the counter asked me for three pounds and ten pence. I was so flabbergasted I meekly handed the money over and went and sat down at a table and read the menu.

It was then that I noticed the prices, toast 80p a round and a mug of ground coffee one pound and 50p. I mean yes the place was nice but it was hardly Claridges or the Hilton. The waitress brought my coffee over with a large plate containing two rounds of toast cut from corner to corner and two small pots of jam with a couple of portions of butter and all on a doily with a serviette. Very nice it looked too but it was hardly worth 80p a slice and the toast was thin. The moral of the story is always check the prices before you order or buy something.

On another health note Commander Riker has gone off sick, he has a suspected ulcer and I immediately felt sorry for him when I heard of this so I rushed around to see him. He is genuinely ill and can’t keep anything down. A couple of days later when I had thought about him and his condition I became rather agitated and then angry. How come he has an ulcer at 27? He is a clean living soul who never drinks to excess, has never touched anything other than prescribed drugs, does not smoke and would be the last person in the world that you could say lived a Rock ‘n’ Roll lifestyle. I had to work hard to get my ulcer by the time I was thirty and that amounted to a lot of lung and liver abuse. Invariably it meant imbibing copious quantities of alcohol and smoking or sniffing “substances” that you could not buy at Boots the chemist. I also lived what could be called a hedonistic and Devil may care lifestyle to get it and yet here was CR with an ulcer and he had not put in any leg work to get or deserve one. Along with me he also has to change his lifestyle and diet radically and I can’t wait to give him the good news that we are going jogging every morning before we set off to work. I imagine his face will light up when I tell him of the diet plan I have worked out for the pair of us. Porridge in the morning with steamed fish and boiled cabbage for dinner and an evening meal of mixed lettuce leaves and salad!

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