The Captain is on the bridge

I was discharged from hospital and arrived home last Thursday evening. It is nice to be home and Special thanks are due to Commander Riker for successfully taking control of the bridge for the last few days. He has done a sterling job and if my mail box is to be believed then my own position as Captain of this blog may be under threat. I have decided that CR will take over when I am unable to make or complete any entries and I am pretty sure that he will get his own guest spot every now and then if only because I love his style of writing. The next few paragraphs are to correct a couple of inaccuracies reported by CR although they were not his fault and were written in good faith.

 An attempt was made to remove the reported blockage under heavy sedation. Apparently a patient needs to be conscious and breathing of their own accord as opposed to being under anaesthetic and respirating through ventilators. It failed spectacularly as I wriggled about and grumbled too much and the blockage could not be removed successfully. They did manage to place stents in the duct in the hope that this would widen it enough for any stones to pass through and if they did not then at least the excess bile which was slowly poisoning me would be able to flow around the blockages and pass safely into the intestines.

As a result my liver function tests, billarubin counts and Gamma GT’s and lots of other meaningless sounding buzzwords  are slowly returning to normal after reaching exorbitantly high levels and I am not as yellow as I was (think of “I am turning Japanese” by the Vapours).  It may take up to a couple of weeks for this condition to pass as my body attempts to rid itself of the toxins that have built up over the three week period prior to and during my stay in hospital. I still feel tired and after only a small amount of exercise such as a short walk, I need to lie down for a while. (I know some of you will be saying what’s new, he always was a bone idle lazy bastard) I am also experiencing dizzy spells as the blood supply to my brain is still somewhat tainted. (This is NOT, I repeat not caused by the over indulgence of recreational drugs)This alone puts driving on the list of many things I can no longer safely perform for the moment at least.

This is the bit where things become a little hazy. I need to go back to hospital at some point, as yet unspecified, for another operation.  Now I have been told so many different things by different doctors, consultants and nurses. These range from, I will be back in hospital in another 2, 3 or 8 weeks. This will be only to remove the stainless steel stents, or it could be to remove the stents and remove the stones from my primary bile duct (if the stones are still there) and then sent home again to wait for another operation to remove my gall bladder, or it could be to do the whole job (three separate procedures) in one go. I have been told the latter procedure is complicated and has some element of risk such as possible damage to the bowel or even worse damaging the pancreas.

Until I have the date for entry to hospital again and I have been told the procedure they are going to perform and I have it in writing I will not know what the hell is going on or when. What is fact is that I still have the underlying problem of my gall bladder being blocked with stones and I am suffering the consequences of that particular condition.  There, clear as mud isn’t it?

For the moment I am on a NO fat diet as opposed to a low fat diet with no red meat, nothing roasted or fried, even semi skimmed milk is out of the question. All dairy products are off the menu as are a long list of other items too numerous to bother mentioning. I can tell you black tea is disgusting and skimmed milk is not worth the bother. There is virtually no difference between Weetabix with water and Weetabix with skimmed milk, only the colour. Basically if it looks good, tastes nice or even smells faintly appealing I can’t have it.

On the bright side I have lost three stone in weight and while I am delighted with this I am rather less happy about the manner in which it has happened. I really do blame my weight gain over the past three years upon the medication I am taking for high blood pressure which has come down so much I am really wondering if I need to take them anymore. I will continue with the tablets until after I am eventually no longer dependent upon medication or surgery for my underlying and immediate problems. However for now at least, the Caption is on the bridge.